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Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Remembering Katrina....



Psalm 69
Save me, O God,
for the floodwaters are up to my neck.
Deeper and deeper I sink into the mire;
I can't find a foothold to stand on.
I am in deep water,
and the floods overwhelm me.
I am exhausted from crying for help;
my throat is parched and dry.
My eyes are swollen with weeping,
waiting for my God to help me.
.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Rummy is "Not Santa Claus"

Well, thank Jesus he cleared that up! But you will never convince me he isn't the dirty rat bastard that comes down my chimney and steals my cookies...

More things Rumsfeld is NOT:

He is NOT telling the Truth....








He is NOT Fonzie......






He is NOT the Zombie from Thriller





Does NOT have Big Brass Ones....






Is Not that obscure little known superhero, "Static Shock"








Is NOT shaking Saddam's hand.....oh, wait, yes he is........





Is NOT a complete ass....oh, wait, yes he is....








And is NOT trying to assault your mind with subliminal messages......

Friday, August 25, 2006

Ann Coulter is swimmingly irrelevant....



Kirsten Powers managed to do something no human has done in the past.....SHUT ANN COULTER THE HELL UP!!!

How sweet was that....

I mean it was a bitch slap followed by a roundhouse kick to MAnn's adam's apple.

Ann said (and I shit you not) that Afghanistan was going "swimmingly" and that Osama Bin Laden was "irrelevant".

Kirsten followed with a smack down of 'oh no you didn't' by saying the man who directed the attacks of 9/11 is "irrelevant?"...etc., etc.

Oh Smack...

Will someone PLEASE do the world a favor and put Ann in the trunk of your car and drive her into the damn lake! I mean, shouldn't this bitch be in JAIL for voter fraud by now? I honestly throw up a little when I hear her talk her hate-filled, factless bullshit.

In the future, all Ann Coulter's Hannity and Colmes appearances should come with a WARNING label, kinda like a Gremlin. Yes, Gizmo was alot cuter than Ann...But on Ann's box it should say:

WARNING! exposure to facts, logic and history will cause Ms. Coulter to become disoriented, dizzy and incoherent. Should this occur, grab some duct tape while she is still in her incapacitated state, place a piece firmly across her mouth, and throw her out the nearest 4 four story window.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Is It Just Me??

Is it just me or is Tucker Carlson kind of hot?
I never ever thought I would ever say that...
but I've always had a thing for sexy nerdy guys.


My One Year Anniversary!!!

Yesterday was my one year anniversary on Blogspot. Yup. No one got me anything.
But I would like to thank people like:

Dusty--you are so funny and smart. I am thrilled that thru this bloggin' crap, I have met a wonderful woman like you.
Helen--your passion is palpable! I love your dedication to animals and justice! It has been a pleasure getting to know you.
Espella--you are an ass-clown.

Everyone else, thanks for stopping by, putting up with my foul language, dorky posts and for sharing my vision for a Bush-free White House!

Love,
Peace,
Shelly

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Can you feel a Draft?


If this doesn't reak of the beginnings of the "New Draft", I don't know what does.

(www.cnn.com)
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- President Bush has authorized the U.S. Marine Corps to recall 2,500 troops to active duty because there are not enough volunteers returning for duty in Afghanistan and Iraq, Marine commanders announced Tuesday.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Massengill Republican Douche....


Just in time for the elections!!

Massengill Republican Douche
For that " I just got fucked by the Republican Party" unclean, skanky feeling...

Also available in "Katherine Harris" in select areas.

Bush Confused About Wiretapping

In response to the recent court ruling defining Bush's NSA Wiretapping as ILLEGAL, Bush fired back saying,
"I don't know what all the fuss is about. I mean I can't even tap cell phones or portable phones...they don't have wires! When talking about wiretapping, you have to have wires. I mean, you people are ignoramisus. Our intelligence indicated that the terrorists are using rotary phones."
After the press conference, Bush laid out his 8 tiered "pyramid" scheme to save Social Security.
(thanks diva for the idea)

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Google

go to www.google.com and type the word failure in the search bar. The first match won't surprise you....


...

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

'The Not-So-Honorable George Allen

George Allen. What a douche. Open mouth insert "mucaca".
Senator Allen tried to play down the racial slur by saying he knew nothing of it's meaning, he just kind of thought it up and said it.
Well, of course he was lying.

from Wonkette:
According to two Republicans who heard the word used, “macaca” was a mash-up of “Mohawk,” referring to Sidarth’s distinctive hair, and “caca,” Spanish slang for excrement, or “shit.”
Said one Republican close to the campaign: “In other words, he was a shit-head, an annoyance.” Allen, according to Republicans, heard members of his traveling entourage and Virginia Republicans use the phrase and picked it up.

Well, that’s underwhelming. Calling Sidarth a shithead is a lot less funny than calling him some made-up nonsense word that just happens to mean “stub-tailed Tunisian monkey.”
www.wonkette.com


Well, people do your homework. Randi Rhodes did hers and outed Mr. Allen's genetics. His MOTHER is French/Tunisian and Senator Allen himself speaks fluent French. I am sure he has not only heard the word Mucaca, (which he said TWICE during his little speach), he knew exactly what it meant. Here is a word for the Senator and Presidential hopefull from the Republican party (yeah right, like that is going to fucking happen)..... DOUCHBAG!!!

Elvis











There must be lights burning brighter somewhere
Got to be birds flying higher in a sky more blue
If i can dream of a better land
Where all my brothers walk hand in hand
Tell me why, oh why, oh why can't my dream come true

There must be peace and understanding sometime
Strong winds of promise that will blow away
All the doubt and fear
If i can dream of a warmer sun
Where hope keeps shining on everyone
Tell me why, oh why, oh why won't that sun appear

We're lost in a cloud
With too much rain
We're trapped in a world
That's troubled with pain
But as long as a man
Has the strength to dream
He can redeem his soul and fly

Deep in my heart there's a trembling question
Still i am sure that the answer gonna come somehow
Out there in the dark, there's a beckoning candle
And while i can think,
while i can talk
While i can stand,
while i can walk
While i can dream,
please let my dream
Come true,
right now
Let it come true right now

Such a wonderful song.......
When I was a younger, I would wake up every Saturday morning to my mom playing Elvis ALBUMS on her stereo. I would think, 'if I hear one more Elvis song, I am going to die.' Now, I would give anything for those Saturday mornings.
My mother was a dancer and she really wanted to be Ann Margaret. She and I would dance out the scene in Viva Las Vegas where Ann and Elvis did the "My Baby Loves Me" thing. Okay, that is kinda silly, but loads of fun.
The anniversary of my mother's death is tomorrow. She died of Brain Cancer. It hit her so suddenly, and she was gone 3 months later after aggressive treatments. She is why I fight against the spin machine for Stem Cell research. She is why I am so diligent. She is why I am a democrat. She is why I think outside the box. She is why I love Elvis.
May they both inspire me to be a better person everyday.....

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Talledega Nights

I went to see Talledega Nights, the Ballad of Ricky Bobby. Aside from it's obvious humor, the politcal undertone was palpable!
I live in Tulsa where there are enough republicans to sink a battleship. I sat on the very last row, in the dead center. To my right was a man who whooped and hollered during a cameo by Dale, Jr., and had his flip-flopped feet propped up on the back of the chair behind him. I was surrounded by rednecks. I was surrounded by NASCAR fans who were too stupid to know the movie was actually making fun of them.
The political jokes were very obvious to me. The French guy was the gay 'bad guy'. . There was a mention of Halliburton, gay marriage, and even a "these colors don't run" comment. The Frenchie even mentioned that America gave the world "George Bush". The only thing that was missing was Toby Keith.
What was very obvious was the LACK of NASCAR stars in this movie. Where were the cameos? There was enough product endorsement laced throughout this movie to have Will Ferrill swimming in Wonderbread, Dominoes and Taco Bell for years to come, not to mention a honest to God Applebee's commercial in the middle of the flippin' movie!!!
In the beginning of the movie the announcers for the races were the actual Fox Sports NASCAR announcers.....then they went AWOL and NBC Sports announcers finished the movie. I wonder if during production, they realized they were participating in a movie that might offend some of their watchers, that is...
If they were smart enough to get it.
As for the movie itself, it had some slow parts, but it made up for it with laughable metaphors that would make any Democrat proud.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Keep your matches, but give up that toothpaste!!!

Are you kidding me? I have seen numerous pictures of people in the airport throwing away toothpaste, shampoo, deodorant, lens cleaning solutions, even fingernail polish. I heard that you couldn't board a plane with liquid lip gloss.
Oh no you didn't....
I don't go to the grocery store without lip gloss in tow.
I mean when people can carry books of matches on a plane, I think the last thing that needs to be confiscated are tubes of Bubblegum Sparkle lip gloss! I would throw a fit like a 3yr old at Wal-Mart if someone tried to take my spritzer and Clinique lip gloss...

War Criminals Making Up The Rules....

Hot from the Associated Press:
August 10, 2006
The Bush administration has drafted amendments to the War Crimes Act that would retroactively protect policymakers from possible criminal charges for authorizing humiliating and degrading treatment of detainees, according to lawyers who have seen the proposal.
The White House, without elaboration, said in a statement that the bill "will apply to any conduct by any U.S. personnel, whether committed before or after the law is enacted"...
Two attorneys said the draft was in the revision stage but the administration seemed intent on pushing forward its major points in Congress after Labor Day. The two attorneys spoke on condition of anonymity because their sources did not authorize them to release the information.
The move is the administration's latest effort to deal with treatment of those taken into custody in the war on terrorism. At issue are interrogations carried out by the CIA, and the degree to which harsh tactics such as water-boarding were authorized by administration officials.
A separate law, the Uniform Code of Military Justice, applies to the military. The Washington Post first reported on the War Crimes Act amendments Wednesday. One section of the draft would outlaw torture and inhuman or cruel treatment, but it does not contain prohibitions from Article 3 of the Geneva Convention against "outrages upon personal dignity, in particular humiliating and degrading treatment." A copy of the section of the draft was obtained by the Associated Press.
"I think what this bill can do is in effect immunize past crimes. That's why it's so dangerous," said a third attorney, Eugene Fidell, president of the National Institute of Military Justice. Fidell said the initiative was "not just protection of political appointees but also CIA personnel who led interrogations." Interrogation practices "follow from policies that were formed at the highest levels of the administration," said a fourth attorney, Scott Horton. "The administration is trying to insulate policymakers under the War Crimes Act."


Thanks BushCo!
You have found a way yet again to undermine the basic fundamentals of what America stands for. I wonder if the Commander in Chief can be prosecuted under UCMJ??
If you can't beat the law, change it to suit your illegal activities.
What happened to bringing morality and ethics back to the White House? What happened to the Moral Majority?
That "moral majority" is skull fucking the constitution...that is what they are doing.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Disgusting...


What is that nasty ass, rat-looking, gross, disgusting thing holding that poor possum??

Why it is none other than Katherine "Knockers" Harris!!!
She actually ATE possum at this Florida event.....
That is kind of canibalistic isn't it???

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Global Warming is a Hoax

Or at least it SEEMS to be in Oklahoma.
Today it was 102 in Tulsa. I had just gotten in from a dip in the pool, changed into some dry clothes, sat on my couch with a nice cold drink with the A/C running at about 74.
I was watching Channel 6 in Tulsa (www.kotv.com) when they ran this CNN story titled "Hilarious Heat Wave". How offensive I thought that was to all these people who are actually suffering from the effects of this crazy heat.
People are dying. There is nothing funny about this heat.
I phoned the station to express my disgust and the man on the other end, who called himself the Assignments Manager, said that he didn't think there was anything wrong with it. I mentioned the people who are really suffering would probably disagree with him. I mentioned the 'Cooling Stations' around town shutting down. He said his tax dollar should not go to help the homeless. I had a hint he was a Republican after that comment. I then said, "I guess you don't believe in Global Warming either." After he laughed and said "no", he said that the Meteorologist at Channel 6 doesn't believe in Global Warming either.
I was shocked at that.
He went on to say that there is "no credible evidence global warming exisits" It was then I knew he was reading from the Republican Talking Points.
I mentioned that there WAS credible evidence supporting the existance of global warming and that professors at the University of Oklahoma, one of the nations top Meteorology schools agreed with me. He assured me they did not.
Well, David Karoly, a Meteorologist Professor at the University of Oklahoma, spoke resently about Global Warming.
"Karoly said the signs of global warming are not just noticeable to scientists who study its effects as he does. He said global warming causes blooming season to start earlier and birds to nest earlier in the year.“Flowers bloom earlier, snow melts earlier,” Karoly said. “There are many impacts showing around the world.”From his research, Karoly said humans’ impact on the environment has caused larger amounts of greenhouse gases, such as carbon dioxide, to be released into the atmosphere.“Greenhouse gases act like a blanket and reflect the sun’s heat back at the surface,” Karoly said."
I have contacted the station's general manager and some of the meteorologists via email and I will get back to you with their responses.

When will science be science and not politics? When will it be acceptable to rely on real scientific study? When will people stop looking to their politics and start paying attention to the scientists and people who study things like Global Warming, Disease and poverty?
It was evident this week when the FDA admitted that policy, not science, made the rubber stamp decision for the Plan B pill.
Enough already......

Friday, August 04, 2006

Goodbye Norma Jean..

















As some of you know...I love Marilyn Monroe.
Tomorrow is the aniversary of her death on August 5, 1962.
I hate the month of August.
I say Goodbye to Marilyn, Elvis and my mother.
Three people that would make the world be a happier place if they were still around.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

"its hot..they blow shit up when its hot..."

Is this man schitzo or what? Not only was he delusional..he was asking himself questions and answering them.
Very disturbing...


Blip Transcript from todays Senate inquiry:
Afghanistan - um, I don’t know who said what about if the Taliban are gone but, in fact, the Taliban that were running Afghanistan and ruling Afghanistan were replaced. And they were replaced by an election that took place in that country, and in terms of a government or a governing entity, they were gone, and that’s a fact.

Are there still Taliban around? You bet. Are they occupying safe havens in Afghanistan and other places — correction, in Pakistan and other places? Certainly they are. Is the violence up? Yes. Does the violence tend to be up during the summer, in the spring, summer and fall months? Yes it does. And it tends to decline during the winter period. Does that represent failed policy? I don’t know. I would say not.


Did I hear that Rummy is blaming the violence and failed policy in Iraq and Afghanistan on the weather??
I can almost hear the recruiting stations locking their doors and closing up shop. No one is stupid enough to purchase a ticket for this crazy train with this lunatic at the wheel.
I am more surprised the Senators on the Committee didn't immediately call in the guys in white coats. Rummy clearly needs medical intervention.

Hasselbitch is at it again.....

The View's resident retard Elisabeth Hasselbeck got her panties in a wad over the "Plan B" emergency abortion pill.
(You can view the exchange at huffingtonpost.com)
What the clueless twit is "unawares" of, is that the "abortion pill" is available by prescription. There have been pharmacists, while standing on their moral highground, refuse to fill those prescriptions. This argument on the Hill is about Plan B going over the counter.
Mrs. Hasseltard is for the death penalty but says that "life begins at penetration". First off, that "life begins at penetration" thing is biologically and scientifically incorrect. Secondly, I can't believe she said that outloud.
Death penalty...yes. Abortion...NO! Spoken like a true redneck..."Throw 'em back, kill 'em when they're bigger."
Should the Plan B pill be available over the counter? You can't even get Sudafed over the counter! As of September 30, you have sign a log book and state your purpose for buying Sudafed. (Thanks to crazy ass meth users who probably failed chemistry in high school, but learned how to extrapolate the necessary ingredient for making crystal meth out of Sudafed!)
I am going to side a little bit here with Hasselskank. I don't think Plan B should be available to any 15 year old who walks into Walgreens with that freshly screwed look. I agree a prescription from a doctor is probably the best route.
But "emergency" contraception by sheer definition doesn't give you the time...it is an EMERGENCY. In those cases, the medication should be available OTC with proper counseling and documentation.
I am going to have to let my liberal show and say that I don't want the government or some James Dobson-ised Pharmacist to dictate to me my reproductive choices.
File this under "personal responsibility" and move on....

Oh! And Elisabeth "former Survivor" Hasselturd.....I hear they are doing "Survivor Darfur"...sign the fuck up.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Pirates of the Constitution

The squabble over the "Morning After Pill" at the FDA has me wondering just how insensitive and out of touch Republicans are. How unconstitutional can they be?
Senator Tom Coburn, who thinks the pill should only be available by prescription (duh, it already is you moron), also thinks that it will be used recreationally. Isn't Viagra technically a "recreational" drug?
So, does Coburn condone those handfull of pharmacists that have REFUSED to fill the Rx based on their morals? Are these the same pharmacists that don't mind dispensing Viagra to sex offenders? Or to men who are using Viagra with their mistresses instead of diddling their wives?
Is getting a prescription filled at your local Walgreens going to include a "morality test"? Who is the Pharmacist behind the counter to judge my soul by choosing not to honor my prescription for Plan B?
It isn't just the Vice President of the United States, or the President, or the Attorney General, or the Senate, or the House that are Pirating our constitutional rights....it is these holier than thou Republicans that say you aren't a Christian if you voted for Kerry. It is the Pharmacists that won't fill your prescription based on THEIR morals. When did it become okay to push your religion, your morality or your values on the American Public at large?
My "soul" is mine. I don't need your protection. I don't need your intervention.
I won't be condemned to servitude on your ship of minions....