Thoughts on Bush-Speak....

(im back by the way, I didn't get moved just yet..)







Bush Speak: "Doing a great job"
In Reality: "Expecting his resignation on my desk as soon as I can find the oval office by following the trial of m&ms I left"

Bush Speak: "Doing a HECKUVA job"
In Reality: "Hold on to your ass, we are all screwed"

Bush Speak: "The economy is strong"
In Reality: "The economy is strong for China cause they own everything in America the Saudi's don't"

Bush Speak: "Iraq is at a turning point"
In Reality: "All hell has broken loose"

Bush Speak: "The Taliban is basically disbanded" (this is also Cheney Speak)
In Reality: "Our troops were diverted from the real war to go to Iraq...now Afghanistan is fucked"

Bush Speak: "I just really don't spend too much time on him"
In Reality: "Osama gave me my war and I owe the bastard a pretty good head start"

Bush Speak: "Wanted Dead or Alive"
In Reality: "Bon Jovi kicks ass"

Bush Speak: "I think George is doing a fine job" (Acutally Laura Speak)
In Reality: "I was programmed on our wedding night by Babs to do and say whatever the hell they tell me to"

Bush Speak: "Iraq has obtained the means necessary to make WMDs"
In Reality: "That's my story and I'm stickin' to it."

Bush Speak: "We have enough troops in Iraq"
In Reality: "So does the insurgency"

Bush Speak: "...incarcerated, indicted or currently under investigation..."
In Reality: "my campain contributors, my associates, and half my administration"

Bush Speak: "....I promise to uphold the Constitution of the United States of America..."
In Reality: "hehe....i had my fingers crossed and that Bible was a copy of Moby Dick. Learned that from Fried Green 'Maters...hehe....Fuckers..."

Bush Speak: "I am the decider"
In Reality: "Presidental Signing Statements rock!!...Thanks Alberto!!!"

Bush Speak: "Illegal immigrants bolster the economy"
In Reality: "I ain't payin' no $2.99 for a head of lettuce"

Bush Speak: "Immigrants do the jobs that American's won't do"
In Reality: "Minimum wage my ass!"

Bush Speak: "Border Security"
In Reality: "..couple of junk yard dogs and a deputy for every 200 miles of border sounds 'bout right"

Bush Speak: "I don't remember him"
In Reality: "Jack Abramoff and I did it in the Lincoln bedroom, Gannon took pictures"

Okay, that last one was over the top .....

Saying Good-bye for a while....

I am moving back to Tulsa for a while, acutally for the summer then starting a new job. I am going to take a few weeks off, then travel to California the first of July. I am not going to blog for a while. Actually, you guys have become very important to me. I like reading your thoughts and funnies. I will miss you while I am on vacation. I am also sorting out some very complicated issues in my life with family and work, your thoughts and well-wishes will be much appreciated.
Have a very nice Memorial Day. I hope for you guys only the best! I will check in on your blogs time and time again and leave my little notes. But for now I am just wanting to clear my head and try to focus on my tan!!
Peace to you all!!!!
Shelly

JACK CAFFERTY READ MY EMAIL!!!!

HOLY CRAP!!!
I sent an email to Jack Cafferty regarding the FBI seizure of the documents on Capitol Hill.
I wrote:
"Give them to Bob Novak. Then we will all know what is in them by morning."
I was shocked to just hear "...and Shelly from Caddo, OK wrote..."
And he laughed.
I made Jack Cafferty laugh.....

Bush's Dwindling Base.....And other people who piss me off....

Bush's "base" is becomming more and more narrow. The "haves and have more" are becomming the "have been imcarcerated and the have been indicted". Now, Ken Lay and Jeff Skilling are going to be cell mates, that is until Bush pardons them.

More Bullshit from the Decider: I see that Bush got Brett onto the federal bench. This bastard, if you don't know Brett Kavanaugh, was Kenneth Starr's bitch during the Clinton investigation.

On Iraq: Bush responded to a british reporter that he was "misinterpreted" and he "learned from" from of his ill-spilled redneck-isms....How the fuck do you misinterpret "I don't know where he is...i just don't spend too much time on him"? How do you misinterpret "Mission accomplished"? Bush also said that "Abu Garaib" (which he can't pronounce) was one of the major "missteps" of the war on terroism. Jesus Christ himself could not get this man to admit to HIS mistakes. Saying someone "misinterpreted" you is basically escaping accountability...typical of this White House.

It is past time for this shit-kicker to get his ass back to Crawford.....Resign for Christ's sake......

An Inconvenient Truth

Bush has stated he WILL NOT see Al Gore's Documentary about Global Warming.
I watched the trailer and nearly cried and got excited to see this film. Maybe a good idea would be for a huge screen to be erected on the mall in Washington and the film be played over and over again.
I for one, can't wait to see this film. I really respect Al Gore more now. I did get kinda upset with him when he was running for president and did not press the enviromental issue.
So, please go see this film. Get the point and do something!!

A Year Ago Today

The bill that gave Goverment funding to Stem cell research was passed a year ago today.
The accomplishments since this bill??? NOTHING. Not one single dime as actually been spent on the research.
You Go Bill Frist.
Oh, and I am in a pissy mood today and hate ALL REPUBLICANS.
Fuck them all!!!

Happy Friday to You All....

Well, I have been sick for the last week, so I haven't blogged or emailed anyone. It is about 5:15am, and since I am having trouble sleeping, thought I would write a quickie note.
I have been waiting all week for Fitzmas people. When will Karl be indicted? I mean, these teaser articles are getting me all excited!!! I figure since it is Friday, the news will break today. Fingers are crossed on this one.
Can't wait to see Paul Begala's smiling little face when Turd Blossom (which IS NOT going to be a good prison nick name by the way) resigns.....
Peace

Al Gore on SNL

Al Gore, the man who should be king.
The link to watch the opening of SNL is here:
http://www.crooksandliars.com/2006/05/14.html#a8280

Oh, If Only the American public could have elected him....
Wait!!!!
They did.
Happy Mothers Day!
Peace

Can You Hear Me Now???

http://www.usatoday.com/news

America....

Bush is Listening...

Use Small Words.....

The "Truthiness" of the Iraqi Information Minister...

I recently came across some quotes from the Iraqi Information Minister. It is pretty amazing, cause he is more accurate than we gave him credit for......

1. "W. Bush, this man is a war criminal, and we will seethat he is brought to trial"
2. "They think we are retarded - they are retarded."
3. About Bush: "the leader of the international criminal gang of bastards."
4. "the insane little dwarf Bush" (my favorite!!!)
5. "The midget Bush and that Rumsfield deserve only to be beaten with shoes by freedom loving people everywhere."
6. "Rumsfeld, he needs to be hit on the head"
7. "Bush is a very stupid man. The American people are not stupid, they are very clever. I can't understand how such clever people came to elect such a stupid president."
8. "This criminal (Bush) in the White House is a stupid criminal"

Then I found some other quotes that aren't so accurate:

1. "We know where they are. They're in the area around Tikrit and Baghdad and east, west, south and north somewhat." –on Iraq's weapons of mass destruction, Donald Rumsfeld.
2. "I don't do quagmires." Donald Rumsfeld
3. "Mission Accomplished" George Bush

Ann Coulter...Felon....

****Blogger Note 05/14/2006: I had to change the name of this post from "Ann Coulter SheMale...Felon" to the current name...Why do you ask? Well, the people searching out SheMales kept ending up here. I have map stats and it tells me how people get to my blog. The Dubai, UAE on the map stats was searching out "Shemales" and that is how this fucking arab perv got to my site...



I told you guys back in October that Ann Coulter was a SheMale!! Now there is proof...
Not only did Ann Coulter commit a FELONY by falsifying her voter registration in Florida, then voting at the wrong precinct (after being confronted), she omitted checking the appropriate box indicating her sex. You can view Mr. or Ms. Coulter's application for voter registration on: http://www.bradblog.com/archives/00002807.htm
The thought of Ann being a felon, therefore not being able to vote, makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. This whole voter fraud thing has really shut her up....what else could you ask for? They should give her a huge ass fine, and lots of community service. And I couldn't think of anything that would serve the community more than having her silent. I don't think she will go to jail. But I am pretty sure if she does, she WON'T get molested.

The VP's little girl.....

Mary Cheney is talking, for some reason....
Raw Story:
In response to an article Wednesday in which Vice President Dick Cheney's lesbian daughter is quoted as calling Sen. John Kerry (D-MA) a "son of a bitch" for mentioning her sexuality in the presidential debates, Kerry's office fired off this retort to RAW STORY.
Kerry spokesman David Wade said Mary Cheney had "flacked for the most anti-gay administration in history."
“Seems like a suspicious lecture from a political operative who flacked for the most anti-gay administration in history and allowed Karl Rove to divide America for political gain," Wade said. "She’d be more credible if she pushed dad’s administration to support hate crimes legislation and equal rights for gay Americans.”
In a her new book, Mary Cheney slams Kerry.
"John Kerry didn't 'out me', nor did he offend or attack me by calling me a lesbian," she remarked. "It wasn't a secret that I was gay, and I certainly couldn't be offended by the truth,'' she writes. ``What was offensive was that he was obviously trying to use me and my sexual orientation for his own political gain."
"Sitting in the studio audience when Edwards mentioned her sexual orientation, Cheney said she looked at the vice-presidential candidate and mouthed the words 'Go F* Yourself' a phrase her father had earlier employed against Democratic Senator Patrick Leahy," Canada.com adds.


Mouthing the words "Go Fuck Yourself" during the debates? Are we supposed to be impressed by this? I would be ashamed. Obviously, lack of decorum and having no class runs in this family. A Vice President who would say on the floor of the United States Senate to a sitting Senator "Go Fuck Yourself" should have been at the very least censured for his blatant disrespect for the institutions that he as the #2 in charge should respect and uphold.
Plus, she is the ugliest damn carpet licker I have ever seen. (sorry about the carpet licker comment, but if you don't like it, go fuck yourself) Who gives a rat's ass what Mary Cheney has to say in her new book? Unless she is going to write a do-it-yourself guide to ....well, nevermind.....

It's the CIA baby, yeah.......

By NEDRA PICKLER - Associated PressMay 1, 2006
WASHINGTON - It's time for the White House to go on offense and "get our mojo back." Josh Bolten said yesterday in his first interview since taking over as the president's chief of staff.

Well, with Goss out of the CIA and the administration looking for "MOJO" I think there is only one logical choice for head of the Central Intelligence Agency..... Austin "Danger" Powers.....

I tend to agree with Bush on this one......

U.S. President George W. Bush told a German newspaper his best moment in more than five years in office was catching a big perch in his own lake.
"You know, I've experienced many great moments and it's hard to name the best," Bush told weekly Bild am Sonntag when asked about his high point since becoming president in January 2001. "I would say the best moment of all was when I caught a 7.5 pound (3.402 kilos) perch in my lake," he told the newspaper in an interview published on Sunday. (HUFFYPOST)

I, for once, agree with the president. This was his greatest accomplishment as president. Catching a fucking fish. But, you know, it is hard to be proud of:

1. Outing a CIA operative at the risk of national security for your own political gain....(that political gain thing didn't exactly work in this case)
2. Wiretapping American citizens without just cause or Warrant.
3. Making himself immune to over 500 passed laws such as detainee abuse, notifying congress in time of war, etc. by executive Signing Statement.
4. Keeping Rummy on as SOD
5. Waging war in Iraq with impotent amounts of intelligence, not enough soldiers, and no exit strategy
6. Harriet Miers
7. Taking tons of vacay time in 2001 prior to 9/11 thus ignoring the best seller, "Bin Laden Determined to Attack inside America"
8. Having friends like Jack Abramoff
9. and Etc., Etc., Etc.

I would have to say a fishing trip that was a posed photo op, on a lake that was stocked with fish, would have to probably be the highlight of this presidency. Unless of course, when the Jeff Gannon papers come out we find out that the Prez, Rovy and Gannon/Guckert had a full on male threesome.... that might trump the whole fishing story....

Jose, can you see?

"Jose, can you see?
We want you to sing
This ANNNTHEM in English
Cause that's how it should be..."

This is the most ridiculous arguement I have heard....and I WATCH FAUX NEWS!!! Trust me, I have heard some stupid shit....(keep your friends close, keep your stupid ass republican pundits spewing untruths and spin..closer)
Who cares if the Anthem is in English, Spanish, or Farsi? We all are going to be singing it in Chinese anyway.....
I am sure they will get smart and buy the rights to it.....
They own everything else.....

Colbert bombed according to Faux News...

I DID watch the White House Correspondent's Association Dinner live on Saturday. It was drop dead hilarious. I was so excited for today's political commentators to take this on. I never realized the polarity that would insue over Stephen Colbert. Of course, I hate George Bush, so I loved it. Faux News reported it "bombed", "went over the line". Well, I don't think that the telling the truth in comedic or parody form is going over any line.
Wanna know what I thought was going over the line? Remember last year when Laura Bush, our librarian matron First Lady made light of her stupid ass husband George jerking off a horse? I thought that was pretty revolting. Remember that one? Or how about George W. Bush "looking" for WMDs under the couches at the White House while saying "nope, not under there". I thought that was downright offensive.
So, let's get this straight. When George makes fun of himself with a retarded sounding look-alike, that is funny.
But when Stephen Colbert brings a comedic relief to the Decider's decisions, poll numbers, illegal activities (NSA wiretapping, Valerie Plame) the Faux shit will hit the fan.
I am just thanking the Power's That Be that Dick Cheney wasn't there to shoot Colbert in the face...
More power to you Stephen. Be sure to watch in the rear view mirror for Laura.....someone on Huffypost said she was going to "go home, get in her Bonneville and go mow Stephen Colbert down..."
Classic!!!

3 Years from Mission Accomplished...

It was three years ago today that W stood on that air craft carrier with his little flight suit on that accentuated his franks and beans. He stood in front of a banner that proudly said "Mission Accomplished". What mission was accomplished 3 years ago?
The only thing I know now that I didn't know then is that our President is Derrick Zoolander....

Rush's Rx for BS

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. - Rush Limbaugh must submit to random drug tests under an agreement filed Monday that will dismiss a prescription fraud charge against the conservative commentator after 18 months if he complies with the terms.
He also must continue treatment for his acknowledged addiction to painkillers and he cannot own a gun.
The agreement did not call for Limbaugh to admit guilt to the charge that he sought a prescription from a physician in 2003 without revealing that he had received medications from another practitioner within 30 days. He pleaded not guilty Friday.
"Do you think if there was any real evidence, we would have reached a settlement?" Limbaugh said Monday on his radio show.
Limbaugh said that he has been undergoing random drug tests for 2 1/2 years and "haven't even craved a painkiller since I got out of rehab."


When Rush said "Do you think if there was any real evidence, we would have reached a settlement?" it makes me want to puke. Although, Rush Limbaugh makes me want to puke. Now, when I see Daryn Kagan on CNN just knowing she went out with him, makes me want to puke.
My x-hubby is a PharmD and the director of a hospital pharmacy. He has had to bust hospital and pharmacy employees for stealing medications from the pharmacy and from the patient. There is video, computer data and sometimes outright confessions as evidence. One in particular stole numerous pain killers, narcotics, etc. With the intent to distribute. They ALL cut deals with the prosecutor. NONE of these offenders are in jail.
So, Rush, that dog won't hunt.
They had plenty of evidence, cause if his fat, narcisitic, right-winged nut job, ass was innocent, he would have fought those charges to the limit....
But, Rush has been on the Bullshit prescription for years now...and he distributes his bullshit everyday to other right-winged dumbasses. That is the real crime here....that this jerk off has been on the airwaves for so long spewing filth for the masses to absorb.
Right Wing Radio should be investigated by the EPA's Clean Air Initiative...cause that shit is really mucking up the airwaves....